BIG News from Carbondale.

Living in a big city like Carbondale means that our lives proceed at the rate of approximately one thrill per minute--if not more.

This week was no exception, as you can see from the front page of the Carbondale Times, published every Wednesday, whether or not anything has happened in the interim:


Needless to say, children, what with the return of sliding weather, I've hardly had a chance to catch my breath.

(In real news, the farmer's market is now open and I bought some of the season's first spargel* on Saturday--splendid!)


*asparagus. I know one German word, and dammit, I'm going to use it when it comes up.

A Chilling Return to Carbondale.

When I got back home from my trip to New York, your father was at class. But that doesn't mean there was nobody to welcome me when I walked in the door. I was greeted by a friend I have had since I was five years old.


Ta-da! Kringle Bear! And look, I said to myself upon my reentry, Kringle has a note for me!


How sweet, thought I: he's as happy to have me back as I am to be here.


But then I turned the note over.


(In case you cannot read Kringle's writing, the note says: "John touched me when you were away. Just thought you ought to know. Shaken, Kringle.")

Chilling.