Promiscuous Parrots.

So I was watching TV last night and it turns out there's this really unusual type of parrot that has a lot of Australian outdoorsmen very excited because (and apparently this is a big deal) the female is bright red but the male is bright green.

The way the Australians were talking, you'd think they'd discovered a parrot that could accurately predict the future or lay eggs that cured baldness. But no. Just parrots of remarkably different color. I admit I was lured into the show, especially when the Australian man explained that these parrots are highly promiscuous: the women sit in their trees all day and let different men regurgitate food into their mouths, and the men fly from tree to tree feeding as many lady parrots as they want.

Be honest, kids: am I turning into one of those crazy nature-show-loving people?

Majestic Creatures and a Recycling Problem.

Children, if I've never mentioned to you how majestic I find the gray wolf, it's probably because I long ago mailed off the notecards featuring the gray wolf that the Sierra Club sent to me in a bid to get my attention and win my dollars.
















It didn't work.

You know why? Because all my attention was focused on the fact that we had somehow accumulated FIVE lids from laundry detergent bottles. Five. Not the bottles themselves, just the lids. Why were these colorful plastic pests littering our laundry area, you ask? Because Carbondale doesn't accept their particular flavor of plastic at the recycling facility we use.
 

So I've been hanging onto them like a chump, thinking one day either the system will change or I'll do the research necessary to recycle them. But no. I go about my lazy life and meanwhile one of nature's most majestic creatures is dwindling into near-extinction.

I feel like such a wolf-hating fraud.